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transition

Blog entries about my transition.

transition

Normalisation, Dating and Fetishisation

CW: small amounts of transphobia, and references to chasers and surgeryWomen's bodies are deeply and constantly sexualised. We're shown through media and general treatment that how we look is more important than what

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
5 min read
Looking Back
transition

Looking Back

For the last little while I've been meaning to write more transition-related stuff here on my blog. The problem is, like most transition blogs, they tend to taper off after a while. At

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
2 min read
Three Years
transition

Three Years

Three years ago today, I began hormone therapy. With physical changes came social ones, which means it's been a bizarre and eye-opening journey into personal comfort, but also into learning a lot about

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
4 min read
transition

Devil & Angel

When I was young, I had two imaginary friends... sort of. I didn't believe they were real, of course. I had become fixated with the idea of the devil and angel on your

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
3 min read
transition

111 Things About My Transition

On twitter, I posted that for every like a post received, I'd mention some trivia related to my transition. I got far more likes than I was able to easily come with trivia,

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
21 min read
transition

Fear

The other day a friend sent me a casual message, inviting me to go with them to an event. I read the message, saw what the event was and my heart began to

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
4 min read
transition

What Now?

For two years (and change) there has always been Something Else To Do. At the beginning, it was utterly terrifying things, such as talking to doctors, coming out publicly, taking meds to completely

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
2 min read
transition

Two Years of HRT

If you ask a medical professional about feminising hormone therapy, the most helpful response you get seems to be a furrowed brow followed by, "Look, we generally consider it to be a

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
17 min read
transition

"Was it everything you hoped?"

One of the most common questions I get asked by people I come out to is some variation on "what's it like being trans?". Of course, that's a really tough question

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
5 min read
transition

Body Awareness and Transitioning

There's a joke going around at the moment on twitter, similar to other observational jokes I've seen for a while, but done particularly well: Male Writers Writing Female Characters: “Cassandra woke up to

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
2 min read
transition

Compliments, Consent & Relationships

I've been thinking about the complicated nature of relationships. And for a moment forget the "relationship = partner / girlfriend / boyfriend" thing. I mean relationships as in the way to define how we

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
4 min read
transition

Gender-Coded Behaviour

Every trans person had their own ways of coping before they transition. Some have "always" shown behaviour somewhat reflective of their true gender identity. I, on the other hand, got so

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
3 min read
transition

Social Anxiety

My own social anxiety never made much sense to me. It was so specific and so seemingly-random (pro-tip: it wasn't random; it was when I was treated in a gendered way or segregated

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
2 min read
transition

Acceptance Day

A year ago, I wrote this facebook post (slightly modified for re-posting here)... 16 September, 2016 A year ago today, I broke down crying. It was in the morning. I had gotten up

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
7 min read
transition

Shoulda Known

One of the interesting discussions I've had over drinks with lots of other trans people is the one that begins this way: "I have no idea how I didn't figure it out

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
7 min read
transition

Hey, Baby

CW: Public attention from creepy dudes. Most of my transition blog posts have been either general observations about an aspect of transitioning, or specific discussions of experiences I've had. This is... half way

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
6 min read
transition

"So maybe I wasn't that ugly..."

I used to passionately detest the way I looked. I grew a beard and kept it from about age 21 until right before I began transitioning, and GOD I hated it. On myself,

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
2 min read
transition

Identity and Dreaming

Pre-transition, gender only factored into my dreams and internal monologue when I had no choice. I was so deeply uncomfortable being gendered male that in most of my dreams I had no noticeable

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
2 min read
transition

The Sound of My Voice

Voices are really interesting things. For me, my voice was actually the one part of myself related to my body that I wasn't ashamed of. I liked the range of my voice. That

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
4 min read
transition

Emotional Dissonance

Emotions are a major part of our lives. They inform how we react to situations from big (grief, loss or joy) to small (stubbing our toes or finding a buck on the sidewalk)

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
2 min read
transition

High School

I was recently thinking back to my high school days. I went to an all-male high school, which is a pretty shite idea at the best of times, but for a clueless trans

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
2 min read
transition

Please Just See Me

I can't open up my news feed right now without seeing article after article about trans rights in the united states. I can't escape it. At precisely the same moment it feels like

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
3 min read
transition

The Dysphoria I Don't Feel

Before I began hormone therapy, my dysphoria could get very bad, and it was incredibly frequent (I've written about it several times in detail, but a good summary of my dysphoria experiences is

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
2 min read
transition

Reactions

Regenerating your whole goddamn body with hormones and lasers (fuck it sounds cool when I put it that way) is a strange experience. But I'd imagine for others, especially those who aren't used

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
1 min read
transition

Being Trans Is Rad

It's easy sometimes to focus on the stress and problems of being trans. There are bad days or bad moments that stick in your memory. Moments of loneliness or feelings of isolation. But

  • Elissa Harris
    Elissa Harris
3 min read
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